Kids In Casts

Recently, I stumbled upon a viral video where a comedian lamented that we don’t see kids in casts anymore.

In the old days, kids would break their legs and arms all the time. They would injure themselves on the playground, the public swimming pool or the local beach. They’d come to school after falling out of tree or nearly drowning in a river. We’d marvel at their stories and we’d scribble messages on plaster-of-Paris.

“These days all the injuries are psychological,” the comedian quipped. “No one can autograph your crippling anxiety.”

There is some truth to this. In my observation, many kids are wrapped in cotton wool until they leave home. Then, we are surprised that they cannot fend for themselves in the world.

I am a parent myself. I have a 21-year-old son and a 19-year-old daughter living in Denmark.

I know what it’s like. I find it hard to refrain from being a helicopter parent. I even struggle to avoid being a ‘lawnmower’ parent, as someone once described me.  

There is significant value in letting our kids flail around in the deep end so that they can learn to swim.

Our job as parents is less about being an inflatable armband and more about being the side of the swimming pool.

Kids will sputter and thrash about. It will suck, but they will come back stronger.

Every adult first learned this way. It doesn’t matter whether it’s you or Michael Phelps, there was a singular time when you felt the real fear of: If I don’t try, I will drown.

The entrepreneurial journey is, in part, a process of figuring out this balance. We have to parent ourselves to be better at taking risks.

As small business owners, we will inevitably take on water and struggle to breathe.

Cashflow is our oxygen. Businesses fail, not because of a lack of talent but because of a lack of oxygen.

So, how do we entrepreneurs cope with the inevitable occasions that we find ourselves struggling underwater?

Part of the answer is mindset.

Psychologist and researcher Carol Dweck has focused her career on determining the difference between a fixed mindset and a growth mindset.

In attempting any challenge, whether learning to swim or scale a business, mindset is crucial to our success.

A fixed mindset is focused on the outcome.

A growth mindset is focused on the process.

Outcome is important. We know that it will eventually mean the difference between success and failure.

However, we’ll never achieve success in the future if we cannot learn from the failures right now.

Growth mindset is integral to both Lean Startup methodology and the scientific method. When we fall into failure, we have to remember that the side of the swimming pool is somewhere nearby. We just need to find it.

Practically speaking, this means testing our assumptions daily, scrutinising the data and not being disheartened when we’re wrong.

The data may look like failure, but for entrepreneurs it is vital learning material.

My friend Verity gave me a great perspective on this. During a particularly gruelling period where I was struggling both in my business and my personal life, Verity reminded me: “Write this stuff down. Create a ‘Captain’s Log’. You’re learning the most important lessons now. No one wants to be in boat with a Captain that’s never seen rough weather before.”

Jonathan Haidt, the author of the new bestseller The Anxious Generation is currently on a crusade to get young kids off their phones.

Haidt is campaigning for children to attempt adventurous play instead of doomscrolling through TikTok. He wants the next generation to learn that it’s valuable to scrape their knee once in a while.

He’s appealing for us all to engage in our surroundings and be less distracted. That’s how we create a growth mindset.

I believe this is good advice for entrepreneurs. Let’s be more present and take some healthy risks.

Sure, we must apply caution. At the same time, it’s vital that we test our assumptions and course-correct constantly. In between all of it, we can also be present and try to enjoy the process.

We will fail often, but over time we will gain the crucial experience that sustained success requires.

Hopefully, the story we’ll tell later will not be about ‘how we sat in front of our computer/tablet/phone all day long’.

The real story will be about when we jumped into dangerous water and downed ten litres of water, but ultimately prevailed.

Or about when we traversed a dangerous path and sprained our ankle, but ultimately prevailed.

Or about when we started that inspiring company, made a ton of mistakes and almost tanked, but ultimately prevailed.

This is the entrepreneurial way.

Not only will we build up psychological strength, but we will live a more meaningful, purpose-filled life.

And it’s a lot more fun too.

Now, go out and break a leg.

Peace -